


Food

by Rookmoon



Series: Short Friendly Encounters [5]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Because Sans, Dialogue-Only, Fluff, Food, Friendship, Gen, Pasta vs Sandwich, Pranks and Practical Jokes, Prankster Papyrus, Reader just wants some food, dammit, first attempt, puns, who will win???
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-10-02
Updated: 2018-10-02
Packaged: 2019-07-24 00:40:19
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 460
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16170053
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Rookmoon/pseuds/Rookmoon
Summary: A simple argument over food with Papyrus... and sans inserts himself... as usual.





	Food

**Author's Note:**

> I tried writing dialogue only and ended up with this masterpiece. I hope you enjoy it!

“SPAGHETTI IS SIMPLY THE SUPERIOR FOOD, HUMAN. THE SOONER YOU ACCEPT THIS FACT OF LIFE, THE BETTER.”

“There’s no proof of that, Papyrus. Besides, I just want a sandwich.”

“That’s lazy food. ONLY A MEAL THAT NEEDS EXTENSIVE PREPARATION IS SUITABLE FOR THE  _ GREAT PAPYRUS _ !”

“You do need to prep a sandwich. You gotta get the bread and whatever you want on it.”

“BUT IT IS SIMPLY FOODSTUFFS BETWEEN TWO PIECES OF BREAD.”

“And Spaghetti is noodles and meat drenched in tomato sauce.”

“That may be true, BUT THERE IS NO BETTER MEAL THAN MY SPAGHETTI.”

“We’ve had that every day since I came over. My squishy human stomach wants something else.”

“SIGH. THEN THERE IS NOTHING MORE I CAN DO FOR YOU, HUMAN. ENJOY YOUR SANDWICH…. _ IF YOU CAN FIND THE BREAD _ ! NYEHEHEHE!”

“Oh no. Whatever shall I do?”

“NYEH HEH! YOU HAVE BEEN THOROUGHLY JAPED BY THE GREAT PAPYRUS!”

“Where’s the bread?”

“OH, IT’S IN THE FREEZER.”

“Why is it in the freezer?”

“because it needed to chill out.”

“WHAT ARE YOU DOING IN HERE? I THOUGHT YOU HAD GONE TO GET MORE PASTA SAUCE- Wait, WAS THAT A  _ PUN _ ?”

“what would you do if I said yes?”

“I WOULD SCREAM.”

“then no. looks like that bread was put ‘on ice’ though. you could say it was a cold thing to do, bro.”

“NYEEEEEH!!!!! SANS, STOP YOUR TOMFOOLERY THIS INSTANT!”

“sorry bro. no can do. it’s a cold reality, really… wait, paps, don’t-”

“IT’S TOO LATE FOR THAT, BROTHER. YOU’VE BROUGHT THIS ON YOURSELF.”

“i don’t want the ‘disappointed in you’ look. it’s too cold. no, please don’t narrow your eyes anymore. i can’t take it.”

“I still need to get into the fridge….”

“i can’t move. paps is disappointed in me again. that means i can’t get out of the way.”

“I COULD ALWAYS JUST PICK YOU UP, BROTHER. NOTHING HAS STOPPED ME FROM DOING THAT BEFORE.”

“even if it does help the kid get their sandwich instead of your amazing spaghetti?”

“WHY DO YOU DO THIS TO ME SANS. I’M YOUR FAMILY!”

“don’t know why i wouldn’t. seems like something i would do all the time.”

“DON’T JUST SHRUG LIKE IT’S NOTHING. I’M HAVING A CRISIS OVER HERE.”

“Over bread?”

“NO. THE IDEA THAT SOMEONE WOULD WANT FOOD OTHER THAN SPAGHETTI.”

“How about I just have both then. I’ll have spaghetti after I’m done with my sandwich that I am going to eat.”

“...”

“As soon as I can get into the fridge.”

“...”

“This is too much. I’ll just have the sandwich later.”

“SANS, WHY ARE YOU LIKE THIS.”

“I was wondering the exact same thing.”

“eh, comes with the territory, kiddo.”

“How many times have I asked you to not call me that?”

“not enough, apparently.”

**Author's Note:**

> *Trumpet sounds* And this marks fic number 50 posted on this site!!!  
> This is cause for CELEBRATION!!!!!


End file.
